I know, in one of my past posts, I’ve spoken about getting hurt. Hard to control getting hurt, but still…
I’ve been fooled few days back by a fake recruiter offering me a good job with a good pay. Though I didn’t trust it much, I was made to believe all that until I received my appointment letter. Was utter fake with so many mistakes that even a kid can figure out. I was hurt. You know why? I dreamt. That at least now, I’ll make my mom proud, at least now, I’ll see her prettiest smile. I thought I’ll make her so very happy. I was building my castle in the air.
I’ve never seen my mother so upset before. Yeah she has been sad when I got less marks in a few subjects, but never this much. The reason- my dad. He is a nice person, but as a husband, he never cared for my mom, he never treated her well. He talks, to her cracks jokes, bit if she opposed or disagreed to something he said, I find him to be the rudest person on earth. He has even told her that he doesn’t need her anymore. End? Yeah? But no. My mom is so sanskari that she says nothing ends like this. So what if he says? Once something is said nothing can be taken back. No matter how good you are, your words define you. Again my mom was hurt much more badly than I was hurt.
I’m a very emotional person that I can’t even bear to see a person cry in front of my. Recently, a friend who I thought to be my bff has hurt me to the core. Yeah. Again it’s my mistake. I expected and hoped that the person was good. I was hurt.
I can afford getting more hurt by my bffs.
I can afford getting hurt by fake people.
I can afford getting hurt by breakups.
But, I just cant afford to see a single tear in my mom’s eye. Very soon many people will see the worst me. Something that I’ve never been before. You make that soul cry once, I make you cry for ages.
So there has been much more pressure and so much going on these days that I cannot say it all here. I’m not posting this for any sympathy purpose. I just wanted to lighten up the burden on my head! If any of you feel this was for sympathy purpose, do contact me I’ll delete it.